For those of you who might have missed it, we have the recap of HBO’s Hard Knocks episode 3 in the form of notes.  If you missed the first two episodes you can find Episode 1 here and Episode 2 here.

• J.J. Watt talks about how they need to be the baddest mother F-ers on the planet when they’re on the field.
• Head coach Bill O’Brien and general manager Rick Smith talk about the decision to bring in Quintin Demps and cut Jasper Coleman.  
• They show Rick Smith telling Jasper Coleman he’s let go.
• Jadeveon Clowney practices for the first time in 10 months.
• Clowney is doing one-on-one drills with linebackers coach Mike Vrabel.
• J.J. Watt is unblockable.  He crushes Alfred Blue and causes him to fumble in a goal line drill.
• “That’s why you put me in the damn game!,” Watt screams.
• They cut to Texans WR Uzoma Nwachukwu and his nickname, “E.Z.”
• “I think I’m done calling E.Z., E.Z. man,” wide receiver Cecil Shorts said.  “He’s got like 30 letters in his name and there’s no ‘E’.”
• E.Z. was making big catches in practice, then they cut to him visiting NASA.  
• He won’t stop asking questions, such as “is there water in space.”
• J.J. Watt is doing ball catching drills standing about two feet away from the ball machine.  He could be a full-time tight end.
• Charles James is getting reps at running back and playing both ways at cornerback and running back.  
• Brian Cushing just vomited on the field.  
• Cushing is trying to get Ryan Mallet to look at his vomit.
• Ryan Mallett and Kareem Jackson are napping on the floor at the facilities.  
• J.J. Watt is now talking about how much he loves naps and has his own bed in the equipment room.
• It’s time for the rookie show.  Khari Lee is doing a Bill O’Brien impersonation that’s hilarious. As you can imagine, a lot of blank stares and F-bombs.
• Running back Chris Polk crushes defensive back Daryl Morris.  O’Brien seems to have a man-crush on him.
• Polk keeps talking about chicken and shrimp.  They then cut to him at his new house with his mother.  She’s talking about putting pads on and making him hit her when he was growing up.  She tells the story of him hitting her so hard she couldn’t breathe.
• Kourtnei Brown is talking about Mike Vrabel’s coaching.  He’s going to be a defensive coordinator, then head coach soon.
• They show highlights from last week’s preseason game where Brown gets two sacks on Blaine Gabbert.
• The coaches talk about picking the starting quarterback. Obviously Hoyer ended up winning the job.
• J.J. Watt is playing catch with the crowd…in the upper level of NRG Field.
• Charles James introduces himself to Peyton Manning before the game and tell him he’s a “f-ing legend.”
• Ryan Mallett nearly throws a pick. Then he misfires.  Hoyer enters the game and doesn’t look much better.
• “I want a timeout,” O’Brien screams to a referee. “Bring this F-ing offense over here.  Speed the f-ing sh%t up. I’m tired of watching this bullsh&t.”
• They cut to undrafted rookies Lynden Trail and Charles James making plays.  
• Kourtnei Brown gets a pick-six, trying to make his first NFL team.  
• E.Z. makes a nice catch on a deep ball.  Then on a potential game-winning play, he can’t catch a pass when he was clearly interfered with.  
• Bill O’Brien talks about how losing will never be accepted in Houston.  
• “I think we need to reel back,” O’Brien said when talking with his coaches. “We’re trying to stuff 15 pounds of sh*t in 10 pound bags.”
• My question is why would they want to put feces in any bag?
• They cut to O’Brien’s house and his 13-year old son has suffers from lissencephaly, a genetic condition that results in developmental damage. He has seizures every day.  Really sad moment.
• “I think he’s a wonderful dad,” O’Brien’s wife says.  “I couldn’t ask for a better dad for my kids.”
• It’s a whole different side of O’Brien.  
• O’Brien takes all the quarterbacks into a room and he tells them that Brian Hoyer will be the starter.  
• “We’re going with Brian (Hoyer) because he’s been the most consistent,” O’Brien said.